Monday, August 3, 2009

I wonder...

Shortly after Bethanie was murdered, I did a search on the net and joined a grief support group for folks who had lost a child/grandchild to violence. It was very helpful to be able to vent my pain and anger in a place where people knew what I was feeling. You see, there was no one in the "real" world, other than my family, who knew what it was like to go through such a nightmare. At some point in time, I don't remember exactly when, I started to feel like the group was dragging me down instead of lifting me up. Perhaps I had reached a point where I was starting to heal, but their stories ripped the wounds open anew. Perhaps I couldn't stand the pain of others' stories. I don't really know the reason. What I wonder is this - Does long term involvement in a group such as this actually foster complicated grief?

3 comments:

  1. I find the grieving process is a lot like the process of building muscle. Strength is built on the painful tearing. My heart goes out to you. I notice you are tweeting about several good causes. I am burying my pain in the great joy of helping others. Please join me in my happy distration Signup http://is.gd/22Lq6 Search #Vicky http://is.gd/22Hb9 C Vicky's kidney fund grow! Win $$ http://bit.ly/3889f #♥

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  2. Vicky, thanks for following my blog. I love the sites you listed and I hope they do well for you. I would like to encourage you to visit my living donor site and post some of your experiences as a person waiting for a kidney. I think it would add an interesting perspective to my ramblings...lol. The link is http://organdonationisafamilything.blogspot.com/

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Thank you!